You’re a successful older man who wants to date a woman significantly younger than him. Needless to say, this goes for ALL people who are dating online. We want what WE want, even if what we want is unrealistic.Websites generally attempt to pair singles with matches who are demographically similar. We’re all so dazzled by looks and youth that we pass up amazing people who are a much better fit. The woman who graduated high school in the same year as you? “I can’t help what I’m attracted to,” say all of my clients – both male and female. I do know, however, that as long as they close their minds to dating people who are age-appropriate, they’re really going to struggle with online dating.Yes, you looked great, but you want to date someone who is attracted to you right now.

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And while online dating can be a great way to meet folks who share your particular sexual preferences or fetishes, tread carefully and remember that your actual face is attached to the information you’re putting up.

There’s nothing wrong with looking for a little naked fun, but keep in mind that your co-workers, neighbors and acquaintances also have access to the internet.

Also, your photos send a message beyond “me IRL.” They reflect your taste and your judgment.

Shirtless photos for men (or bikini photos for women) say “I vacation on the Jersey Shore, pump my fist to house music, use tons of hair gel and probably have at least one tribal / Chinese symbol tattoo.” Myspace-style chin-down eyes-up pouty-face selfies say, “I want to look pretty and am not particularly intelligent.” Far-away vacation shots say, “Have I mentioned that I travel? Use proper punctuation and make sure most of the words are spelled correctly.

You get BOMBARDED by emails from fifty and sixty something Baby Boomers looking to trade up in the world. Yet these men keep on writing – talking about how they’re young for their age, how they’d love to have children, how they have everything in life except a good younger woman. Understand, Dale, there is nothing wrong with you being attracted to a fertile and youthful woman in her 30’s. Instead of searching through hundreds of thirtysomething women who wouldn’t give you a second look, Reverse Match shows you who IS open to dating a 56-year-old man.

You double check your profile to see if there’s something you wrote that’s attracting these older men. If you’re 36, you’re pretty darned confused by these emails. By the time the kid is in high school, Dad will be 74! There’ll be fewer numbers, but at least you won’t be wasting your time. There are a lot of amazing ones out there and they are criminally underappreciated.

So, welcome to Internet Dating Bootcamp, where I'll teach you how to trick unsuspecting users into thinking you’re actually cool and normal. You need to be you in your online dating profile, but the process of creating one is a good time to think about what kindergarten teachers call “being your best self at school.” If you’re attracted to Type-A go-getter types who get up at 6am to exercise, emphasize your similar love of hard work. Want someone who shares your taste for obscure French films? No, not everyone wants to date a carbon copy of themselves, but most of us want to be with someone with some overlapping interests.

If you like low-key creative types, share what it is you make. Put forward the version of yourself that’s most attractive to the person you’re trying to see naked.

You’re done with the bar scene and you’re very much interested in settling down to have a family of your own. Well, if you’re born in 1971, you’re part of Generation X. Your friends are buying their first houses and having their first kids. Maybe he’ll still be vigorous enough to keep up with your active lifestyle. Next, since you can’t convince someone to date an older man, stop trying.